Guy Fieri Gave The Padres ‘Ballpark Food With Balls,’ Until The ‘Hot Rod-Style Flames’ Indicent

Guy Fieri is a celebrity chef, the host of NBC’s Minute to Win It, and, given his dual propensities for bold, chain restaurant-ready flavors and bolder spiked hairstyles, probably a walking fire hazard in one way or another for much of the time he spends awake. Fieri was also, briefly, part of the San Diego Padres’ food services at Petco Park, creating “Ballpark Food With Balls,” before an incident involving what sounds like the most Guy Fieri crime of all time.

Due to pending litigation, (Petco Park food and beverage manager Brady) Garvin was unable to discuss Ballpark Food With Balls any further, but fans and vendors told the story of how what initially seemed a perfect pairing ended in legal action, acrimony and an alleged act of vandalism by Fieri in which he—or someone—spray-painted, in the words of a 2009 police report “hot rod-style flames” on top of both dugouts and in a half-dozen luxury boxes.That’s one of about seven “Is this real life?” moments from the Fieri/Padres part of David Roth’s piece on ballpark food at The Awl — bobbleheads resembling Fieri that were originally destined for a Petco giveaway were later repurposed to resemble Shaggy 2 Dope and sold at the 2010 Gathering of the Juggalos, for example — which is so good that, hey, here’s another link. Go read it.