Joker Phillips Plays Bass On Most ‘New Country’ Song Ever Written
Bill Hanstock is a writer, author and Emmy Award-winning producer. He began writing for SB Nation in 2011.
The Kentucky Wildcats are gearing up for another five-plus-win season, but luckily head coach Joker Phillips is not too busy that he can't still pick up the ol' bass GIT-tar and lay down some sweet licks for his good buddy and Cats fan JD Shelburne! He even went ahead and appeared in the video for the song, too. Hit the jump to see the worst music video for the worst country song you've heard in a while. And Joker Phillips, also.
If you haven’t taken your “new country” medication, you’re gonna want to muscle that down before clicking play on the below video.
Okay, so.
Woof.
Okay.
The takeaway here is not that Joker Phillips is involved. The man does a fine job. He sure did play the bass here. He sure did rock out the appropriate amount in the video (read: lightly sway). The takeaway is just how bad of a song and video this is, due to it being the most ridiculously “new country” thing of all time.
You’ve got JD “Gol-Durn” Shelburne looking like a Fabio head on a melted He-Man doll, replete with awful “new country” facial hair and flat-ironed, flowing locks. He’s got the ironic Abercrombie faux-vintage split-neck baseball tee and of course let’s not forget JEWELRY AND SWEATBANDS YEE-HAWWWW.
It’s the smoothest, most over-produced cotton candy country song you can imagine, but makes sure to hit EVERY SINGLE country note it could, in the most singularly disingenuous way possible.
- ramshackle barn
- my granddaddy
- mason jars
- vintage Chevrolet pickup
- gravel roads
- THINGS AIN’T THE WAY THEY USED TA BE
- shout-outs to tractors
- crosses on everything
If we were playing “new country” bingo, everyone would have won just now. Except not really, because we just watched and listened to “Farmboy” by JD Shelburne.
For more on Cats football, visit Kentucky blog A Sea Of Blue, plus SEC blog Team Speed Kills.
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