Watch John Oliver accurately describe the plight of every sports fan on the planet

1. John Oliver’s gotten really, really good at his job really, really quickly. Everyone will watch this today, and then share it on your social media platform of choice with “WATCH JOHN OLIVER SHRED FIFA LOL”, and you’ll miss the central and most painful point of this. FIFA is a horrible institution, a toxic cauldron poisoning the soul-warming flame of soccer itself. It’s not just that John Oliver can do the Jon Stewart thing you’re so fond of hitting the like button on, but it’s the deft hand pointing you towards something so much worse that makes Oliver remarkable here: that you’ll still watch, because for all its faults something in you and billions of other people still feeds off something in the game, something that enables FIFA despite your best critical instincts. Take that in as evidence of his skill, or hell, just hit the little “Share” button and type LOL. Whether you notice it or not, John Oliver’s doing something remarkable here, something broadly applicable to any sports fan struggling with a beloved game that might be in some very filthy custodial hands. (CC: everyone, pretty much.)

2. There actually is a movie about FIFA. Its title is “United Passions,” and in case you wonder what narcissistic managerial drones would create a film about corrupt sporting kleptocrats, your answer is simple: the narcissistic managerial bribe-guzzlers at FIFA. They spent $27 million of FIFA’s “non-profit” money on the film, and did not even attempt to cover up Sepp Blatter’s only remarkable skill as a person in the trailer. (“He is good at finding money.”)

This is the most exciting clip from the entire preview.

THAT TABLE POUND SAVED SOCCER. Add Sam Neill and Tim Roth to the list of actors who will literally appear in anything for money.

3. You can watch the entire E:60 on Qatar’s labor atrocities here, and should.