David Ortiz would be a porn star without baseball, possibly in the big-butt genre

Over at the Player’s Tribune, the Derek Jeter venture that gives athletes a forum, David Ortiz reminds us all of his inherent Big Papiness. The setup:

Just like on the first day of elementary school, we ask athletes to answer 10 questions about themselves so you can get to know them better. Next up is Boston Red Sox slugger David Ortiz.

Ha ha, sounds charming and completely inessential, but I have nothing better to do than

David.

DAVID.

If you were wondering about just how free and honest players could be at The Player’s Tribune, well, this gives you a pretty, pretty good idea. They did not dilute the David Ortiz. They left it for the world to see, and for that we thank them.