NFL quarterback battles are a farce

In May, Cleveland Browns head coach Hue Jackson told the press that it was “too soon” to settle on a starting quarterback. Josh McCown still had a shot to reprise his 2015 role as the team’s starter. The new guy, Robert Griffin III, still had the flash of his “unbelievably believable” Rookie of the Year campaign in 2012, but a string of injuries and a year as the third-stringer in Washington made him a question mark.

On Thursday, Jackson said that he wants to name a starter before the first preseason game. When practice starts on Friday in Berea, Ohio, it will be RG3 taking “four out of every five snaps” with the starting offense, according to ESPN’s Tony Grossi. The fifth snap will go to some combination of McCown, Austin Davis and rookie Cody Kessler in a competition for the backup gig. Even that position battle is unofficially over; it’s McCown’s to lose.

August’s most exciting quarterback competition is already over and the Browns haven’t even started training camp yet.

For fans, position battles are always the best thing to watch during training camp — well, and the fights — but you’ve got to be pretty diehard to keep score on who has an edge in the starting left guard competition. Every year, though, even casual fans try to get excited about quarterback competitions.

The outcome of a battle under center carries a far-reaching effect, shaping what a team does from week to week and ultimately the course of its season. It might be the only thing that makes a preseason game tolerable for more than a quarter.

But we overlook the fact that they’re mostly staged affairs. When teams aren’t going through the Kabuki dance version, it’s usually because they’re trying to decide between the lesser of two evils.

This year’s quarterback competitions are no different.

The Browns and four other teams are ostensibly using camp and the preseason to settle on a starter. Each one has a different situation and a different cast of characters that almost make it look like there’s really something to watch. There isn’t, and you can put all six teams into three typical categories of quarterback competitions.

Denver Broncos
Mark Sanchez vs. Trevor Siemian

Gary Kubiak was eager to tell the world that the Siemian, a seventh-round pick in 2015, had a legitimate shot at the starting quarterback job. Having watched Sanchez over the last six seasons, I was inclined to believe him. But it was Sanchez who took all the first-team reps in minicamp. Last week, Sylvester Williams revealed that Kubiak was opening camp with Sanchez sitting atop the depth chart.

Rookie Paxton Lynch could play at some point, but a rough spring has the first-round pick buried third on the depth chart and headed for a redshirt year.

However the competition shakes out, it’s not a good situation, unless you’re a Raiders or Chiefs fan.

San Francisco 49ers
Blaine Gabbert vs. Colin Kaepernick

It wasn’t all that long ago that Kaepernick was one of the most exciting young quarterbacks in the NFL. But that was two head coaches ago. At the same time, Gabbert was cementing his place on the list of first-round busts.

This offseason, Kaepernick didn’t get early reps under new coach Chip Kelly because he was recovering from a shoulder injury, giving Gabbert an early lead in the race. Since then, Kaepernick’s been cleared for camp. He has the perfect skill set for Kelly’s offense, and he should overtake Gabbert as long as he’s healthy and can adapt to his new coach.

If Kaepernick can’t accomplish that and cedes the starting job to Gabbert, this is one of those QB competitions that winds up in the previous category.

Cleveland Browns
RG3 vs. Josh McCown

Griffin’s got the job 95 percent locked down. Like Kaepernick, it’s just a matter of staying healthy and regaining the electrifying form he showed earlier in his career. Hue Jackson has a reputation for being a miracle worker with quarterbacks, and he’ll have to earn every bit of that reputation if he has to use any of the signal callers behind RG3 on the depth chart.

Los Angeles Rams
Jared Goff vs. Case Keenum

Keenum’s listed as the starter on the team’s official depth chart, but that’s part of the dance teams do when they take a quarterback first overall in the draft, especially one they traded away a bounty of picks to get.

Head coach and noted quarterback expert Jeff Fisher said that Goff and Keenum will both get first-team reps. He even said Sean Mannion, last year’s third-round pick, will get first-team reps. So, officially, this this is wide open.

Unofficially, check out this little piece of Fisher coach-speak from a radio interview he did in June, talking about Goff:

“We’re not going to rush him. He’s a quick learner. He’s got a special and arm and vision, and he’s going to play sooner than I think a lot of people think. We’re not going to put him in position to fail. We want him to be successful.”

They’re not going to rush him, but he’s totally way ahead of where everyone thinks he is.

Word of warning, Goff is the fourth quarterback of the future Fisher’s promised since starting his four-year run of sub-.500 seasons with the Rams.

Philadelphia Eagles
Carson Wentz vs. Sam Bradford

A couple of weeks ago, this looked like the most legitimate quarterback competition of all. Doug Pederson declared that Carson Wentz just wasn’t ready and would be third on the depth chart.

We should have known better. He’s since softened that stance, telling the media that he wants Wentz to be “starter ready” by Week 1. Forgive Pederson, he’s a rookie head coach who forgot how these things are supposed to work.

One thing Bradford’s done consistently throughout his NFL career, the only thing, is wow people in camp. I would expect him to be the Eagles starter when the season begins. There are two other things Bradford’s done consistently throughout his career: get injured and watch his play go wildly up and down from week to week and quarter to quarter. Wentz should have the job sewn up by the end of September.

There’s another question that doesn’t get asked in the camp “competitions” to anoint highly drafted rookies: what if the guy stinks? Camps aren’t set up for players to fail, but it’s possible that a first-rounder shows he’s just not ready for the job. If that’s the case, then the team’s got another quarterback battle on the horizon, a very serious problem.

Last year the Jets had a quarterback battle between Geno Smith and Ryan Fitzpatrick that lasted for about two weeks, when a sucker punch put Smith on the shelf and settled the matter.

Until Wednesday when the team finally re-signed Fitzpatrick, the Jets were on this list again. It would have been the fourth season in a row that the Jets kicked off camp with a question about who would be their starter.

Fitzpatrick isn’t the long-term solution the Jets have been seeking since Mark Sanchez butt fumbled his way to infamy — he’s a temporary fix. For the Browns, who have had 24 different starting quarterbacks since 1999, they’re just hoping RG3 can give them any sense of stability.

When it comes to the position, stability is the next-best thing to the absolute certainty a team gets from bona fide franchise guys.

If your team is having a quarterback battle this month, a real one, you have our condolences.