Aaron Rodgers went shopping for crystals, because he’s Aaron Rodgers

The Aaron Rodgers situation has fast become a fiasco with there being no signs of life in a trade between the Packers and Jets. The Jets lost the leverage they had by circumventing Green Bay and going to Rodgers directly, and No. 12 voicing his desire to go to New York has allowed the Packers to tighten the screws and try to get as much a possible.

It’s enough to cause more than a little anxiety, so Rodgers did the kind of thing Rodgers does in this situation ... he went crystal shopping!

Now, we can’t be sure that Rodgers was actually looking for healing crystals — though it’s a fairly safe bet for a man who made his decisions in the dark and enjoys hallucinogens as a part of his way to seek truth. Out of curiosity I took a dive into the crystal world and tried to see whether these stones could reveal their truth about Rodgers’ future.

This is your classic green and yellow color pairing, representing the Packers’ uniform. It’s also oddly apt for this scenario.

Emerald is the crystal of “hope, renewal, and friendship.” This could either be a renewed faith in the Packers to do right by him and set him free, or a crystal to try and make amends for past hurt and bring these sides together.

Citrine is the crystal of “happiness, abundance, and vision.” We know Rodgers has great field vision, so this makes sense. Also with Rodgers and Jordan Love the Packers have an abundance of quarterbacks. Mutual happiness could be found if the Packers have the vision to let their past go, and send No. 12 to a new team.

Another green element, but this time offset with a white crystal, representing the Jets colors.

In this sense the emerald takes on new meaning, most specifically the hope and renewal elements. Rodgers needs the Jets to have faith in the process and the belief this trade will come through, which will allow for new friendships to blossom as Rodgers joins a new team.

Quartz is the ultimate support crystal. It’s naturally paired with other stones to bolster their strength. It’s the stone of “clarity, healing, and cleansing” all of which are needed if Rodgers changes teams and heads to the AFC East.

We move away to the other end of the color spectrum and into the red and tan spectrum for the 49ers. It’s unclear if they really have interest in Rodgers, but there are some growing murmurs.

Jasper is all about empowerment and protection from negativity. It also buffers you from stress, allowing you to be fully present in a moment. What more does Rodgers need than some jasper to take him from the possibility of New York, and pivot him to San Francisco?

Desert Rose is motivation, energy, and harmony. This is everything Rodgers needs is his life. The motivation to keep playing. The energy to keep it going through age. The harmony to be at peace with returning to the NFL. It also promotes mental vision and quiets your mind, both essential skills for an NFL quarterback.

The crystals say... Aaron Rodgers should go to the 49ers

Don’t get angry at me, Jets fans. Blame the healing stones.