Best of the ACC Tournament

Joe Harris, Virginia

Until around 2 p.m. today, Zanna was the runaway favorite for our Tourney MVP. He was definitely the most fun to watch. But Jabari Parker took the award from him with a monster steal-and-dunk that made just about everyone on press row say, “Wow.” So, Parker is MVP, and Zanna is MFTW (Most fun to watch).

Best band: this usually goes to the Mighty Sound of Maryland, and they brought the heat with versions of ‘Born to Run’ and ‘99 Luftballoons” but the Florida State pep band simply dominated the tourney. They were so good that Swain and I both went up to the director after their team lost, just to tell them how great they were.

Best dance team: Repeat after me- Florida State Golden Girls. This vote is rarely close.

However, Rookies of the Year are the Pitt Panther dance team. They didn’t even get to sit with the cheerleaders! They had seats in the stands, and came down to perform a couple of times with just some dynamite outfits. However, we need to figure out what’s up with Roc just laying there watching the routines. Creepy.

Honorable Mention: Whoever’s playing the horns for N.C. State. Just incredible work, guys. Also, “Fast Fight” is really cool to hear in person.

Surprisingly, nothing on this list has anything to do with the plentiful gentlemen’s clubs in the area.

The addition of the nacho cheese dispenser at the media snacks kiosk. Just a masterstroke by the ACC.

Hayes Permar’s farewell song to Maryland in the Media Hospitality room at the hotel. Set to Manilow’s “Mandy,” it should be up for a Grammy next year.

Sitting next to Country Dan Collins for anything.

Snacks. Lots of snacks.

Referees that hold the whistle to see if a shot goes in. JUST. CALL. IT.

Light’s out as the teams take the floor for warmups. It’s a miracle nobody got hurt.

“Cascada”

The Coliseum’s power source. The Coliseum suffered four outages over two weeks, all weather-related. It’s not the ACC’s fault, nor the Coliseum’s, but it’s gotta go.

“Timber”. Let’s talk about this: y’all need to stop playing Ke$ha at important sporting events. After a few days, the sound of her voice gets folks homicidal.

Finally, some of you fans need to brush up on ye olde rule book. For instance, there is a difference between “over the back” and “their guys are bigger than your guys.” Also, stop with the “traveling” gestures. You’re wrong 99 percent of the time.