The 2011 Kentucky Derby will be run on Saturday in Louisville, and among the many pastimes that come with it, marveling at the horse names ranks up there with the best of ‘em. And with names like Uncle Mo, Pants on Fire, Mucho Macho Man, and Dialed In, the 2011 field doesn’t disappoint.
Kentucky Derby Horse Names: Are There Any Rules?
But are there any sort of guidelines that come with naming the horses? For instance, if we wanted to name a horse “Never Nude” in honor of Arrested Development, would that be allowed? Maybe, but it’s all up to The Jockey Club. After the jump, Slate explains.
...naming a Thoroughbred isn’t as simple as coming up with a good double-entendre. The Jockey Club, the 103-year-old organization that holds the reins to the Sport of Kings in North America, has to sign off on every moniker.
Roughly 60,000 Thoroughbred name requests are submitted every year, and registrar Rick Bailey must sign off on each one. Roughly one-third of the requests are rejected, primarily because they match existing names. In an effort to free up more names, the Jockey Club now “recycles” them after 10 years, so it is possible for horses from different eras to share the same name. There is a mind-blowing litany of other rules and regulations, but in general, no horse can have a name longer than 18 characters, a name that breaches a copyright or has obvious commercial significance, or the name of a “notorious” person. Emphatically forbidden are “names that are suggestive or have a vulgar or obscene meaning; names considered in poor taste; or names that may be offensive to religious, political or ethnic groups.”
In other words, regardless of the horse, “Never Nude” would be a long shot. A man Garrett Redmond challenged The Jockey Club’s jurisdiction over horse names in 2006, and the case went all the way to the Supreme Court, but was ultimately dismissed. On the other hand, none of this is to say you can’t find loopholes in all this:
You want explicit commands? How about Blow Me (1945), Get It On (both 1971 and 1986), On Your Knees (1977 and 2005), Spank It (1985), or 1963’s Go Down, whose sire, of course, was Service. Like ‘em young? Embarrassingly enough, Jail Bait (1947 and 1983), Barely Legal (1982 and 1989), and Date More Minors (1998) all made it into the staid registry.
The list goes on: Golden Shower (1955), Cherry Pop (1961 and 1978), Cum Rocket (1969), Ménage Á Trois (1974), She’s Easy (1978), Adultress (1979), Strip Teaser (1980), Rhythm Method (1982), Bodacious Tatas (1985), Tit’n Your Girdle (1988), Kinky Lingerie (1991), Hard Like a Rock (1995), Sexual Harassment (1997), and X Rated Fantasy (1999). (You can search for risqué racehorse names yourself through the Jockey Club’s online database of current names. If you want a true historical perspective, you’ll need to shell out $325 for the complete American Produce Records.)
Hold up: “Tit’n Your Girdle”? There’s hope for Never Nude, yet... Although if that fails, I think “Dr. Spaceman” would be a pretty fantastic name for a horse, too. Or maybe just “Jack Donaghy.” Wouldn’t you want to bet on a horse named Jack Donaghy? Read more at Slate.
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