It has been clearly established that we here at SB Nation are too poor to be able to compete in -- let alone appreciate -- equestrian Olympic events like dressage and eventing. That’s fine. Not everyone can be the secret CEO of Bain well-off enough to afford a million-dollar dancehorse. You know who can, though? Rich Fellers.
Rich Fellers Sets New Gold Standard For Olympic Names
Bill Hanstock is a writer, author and Emmy Award-winning producer. He began writing for SB Nation in 2011.
Yes, Rich Fellers. A member of the United States equestrian team. Seriously. His name is “Rich Fellers,” and he has the most perfect name-to-event ratio in Olympic history. Because he’s a rich feller. Get it? Here, Reddit even gave us photographic evidence:
So, of course, this got us to thinking of what would be some other perfect Olympic names. Our shortlist:
- Spike Volleyballman
- “Legs” Hurdleton
- Divey Splashworth
- Lee Ping (so many track and field possibilities!)
- Archer Bowman
- Fencing Von Lungestab
- Teri Polo
For more on the Olympics, check out SB Nation’s London 2012 Olympics hub.
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