The New Orleans Pelicans now have a mascot! Unfortunately, a) it doesn’t look like a pelican b) it looks more like, as Seth Rosenthal described it, a murderous, syphilitic version of the Cluck-U-Chicken.
Pierre the New Orleans Pelican is the scariest thing ever, the Internet responds
New Orleans’ rebranding was going fine until they decided to make a clown murder bird their new public face.
Introducing your new mascot Pierre the Pelican! pic.twitter.com/CieVTs3sMt
— New Orleans Pelicans (@PelicansNBA) October 31, 2013
It's the scariest thing in the world, aptly unveiled the day before Halloween. And they unveiled it in the scariest way possible:
"Where should we take the Pelican's picture?" "How about the darkest recesses of the stadium WHERE NOBODY CAN HEAR YOU SCREAM?" "Perfect!"
— Pelican Adam Jacobi (@Adam_Jacobi) October 31, 2013
(Note: Adam's twitter name was not that at the start of the evening.)
Luckily, we're on the internet. And the internet had a damn field day, making the Pelican even scarier somehow (via @talkhoops) 
And putting it in scary movies:
before you die you see the thing pic.twitter.com/3eis02vmVH
— Caitlin Kelly (@atotalmonet) October 31, 2013
— Mike Tunison (@xmasape) October 31, 2013
it's not from this planet. pic.twitter.com/T1AAJ0FkkU
— Caitlin Kelly (@atotalmonet) October 31, 2013
@atotalmonet @Adam_Jacobi “GIVE US A HUG KIDS” pic.twitter.com/KdR7mpmph2
— darthpotatoween™ (@darth) October 31, 2013
@atotalmonet @Adam_Jacobi @themarkberman “THEY ALL FLOAT DOWN HERE PELICANS FANS” pic.twitter.com/x1Eicvooau
— darthpotatoween™ (@darth) October 31, 2013
@Lana @freemaneric @basquiatball I’M OVER HERE DONALD pic.twitter.com/YYjjjnvm6A
— darthpotatoween™ (@darth) October 31, 2013
@HPbasketball HE WATCHES US AT NIGHT. pic.twitter.com/M8IXnNF4cq
— Machado (@ChrisRMachado) October 31, 2013
Some quality GIFs via @Nick_pants
: 
And somehow, the Hornets took even more horrifying pictures of the monster:
HOWS THIS ONE?!? pic.twitter.com/UMk35xyHQi
— Derek Kevra (@dkevra) October 31, 2013
Here’s a photo of Pierre the Pelican shooting a (t-shirt) gun. You’re welcome. pic.twitter.com/c5y6T6DSBH
— Brett (@thecajunboy) October 31, 2013
Of course, this led to more photoshops:
— Kam Pashai (@KamPashai) October 31, 2013
Music was never the same again. pic.twitter.com/ktKnz7XUXs
— Kam Pashai (@KamPashai) October 31, 2013
Pierre even made it to the World Series!
you knew this was coming… pic.twitter.com/vlOqbaFTyM
— Caitlin Kelly (@atotalmonet) October 31, 2013
omfg that bird is everywhere MT @BrettLoGiurato: This photo pic.twitter.com/rV9DvdwwcX
— darthpotatoween™ (@darth) October 31, 2013
OH NO, IT'S GOT ADAM
GOD DAMN IT NO RT @darth: @Adam_Jacobi @talkhoops @ticktock6 @dkevra @atotalmonet omfg don’t even turn around rn adam pic.twitter.com/HcYIzcptGp
— Pelican Adam Jacobi (@Adam_Jacobi) October 31, 2013
But eventually, he retired where all terrifying clown murder birds go when they get old: Miami.
@alucci FREE FISH NIGHT AMANDA pic.twitter.com/6qcRN4KDnC
— darthpotatoween™ (@darth) October 31, 2013
We're so, so scared of you, Pierre.
