Avocados may soon be gone because of the drought and J.J. Watt

You might have heard about the drought in California, land of dreams and produce. Nearly half of all American fruits, vegetables, and nuts are grown there, including 90 percent of avocados sold in the United States. The drought has endangered that supply; your mushy green days might be numbered.

Here’s what you haven’t heard: Houston Texans defensive end J.J. Watt is to blame.

Watt told ESPN today that he consumes “somewhere between 6,000 and 9,000 calories” every day, a mix of chicken breast, bacon, mashed sweet potatoes, pasta, fish, olive and coconut oil, and avocados. So, so many avocados.

“I started crushing avocados,” Watt said.

Watt declined to say exactly how many avocados he crushes on a daily basis, but ESPN ran the numbers and concluded that “it would take about 50 slices of bacon, 20 chicken breasts and 13 whole avocados” to reach his quota.

13 whole avocados per day! That’s 91 avocados per week; 364 avocados per month; 4,745 avocados per year. That is 2,109,627 gallons of J.J. Watt avocado water per year, three-and-a-quarter Olympic-size pools just to keep the Milkman in guacamole.

Per the New York Times, the average American eats just “a sliver” of avocado each week. Won’t J.J. Watt think of the children?

★★★

SB Nation video archives: J.J. Watt is not human (2014)