A 28-year-old American BASE jumper named Josh Miramant has decided to up the ante and horrify the gods and humanity writ large by inserting hooks into his back to support his parachute. He then used this to leap off a 380-foot cliff in Ton Sai, Thailand, because nothing, absolutely nothing, is sacred in this cursed world of ours.
BASE jumper connects parachute to his flesh and I will never stop crying
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.
“I am not a masochist,” Miramant lied.
Maine-born Miramant works for a startup in San Francisco when he is not diving off Southeast Asian cliffs with his back hooks. His LinkedIn profile describes him as a “Learner” and “Internet Tinkerer” who is “Fueled by Curiosity.” Also by gravity and flesh bolts!
Miramant, who is described as being “literally hooked on base jumping” in a majority of immediately available reports, completed his Thai dive in American flag briefs, and was subsequently pictured beaming, flexing, and BLEEDING OUT OF HIS BACK.
Far be it from me to say what the Founding Fathers were or were not fighting for, but I do not think that this was it.
You are STRONGLY ENCOURAGED not to watch it, but video of the jump and fodder for all your nightmares for all the rest of your miserable, haunted life can be found here.
Some unanswered questions:
- What horrible monster piercing place offers this as a service?
- Did Miramant pay actual legal tender for this, and, if so, how much?
- Which and how many human rights treaties does this violate, and how soon can the ICC become involved?
- What happens if something goes wrong with the parachute?
- What happens if something goes right with the parachute?
- WHY?
- WHY?
- WHY?
- WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?
★★★
SB Nation video archives: The extreme athletes of the CrossFit Games (2012)
See More:
