Chip Kelly says the Eagles play super fast so everyone can go home earlier

Chip Kelly was asked Thursday about the reasoning behind the Philadelphia Eagles’ up-tempo play -- if, for instance, there’s a greater philosophy at work, beyond simply trying to get the players the hell off the field as soon as possible.

No. No, there is not.

Yeah, man, there’s a football reason. The reason is: basically everywhere else is better. I don’t want to be here. You don’t want to be here. They certainly don’t want to be here. So, get out. Go see your family. Take your dog for a walk. Have a beer for less than $12. Give your old buddy from college a call. Whatever! Get out of my house, is the main thing. I have urine samples to run.