The internet needs to save beloved ‘HQ’ host Scott, before it’s too late

Are you OK, Scott? I’m worried. You don’t need to say anything now. Just send me a signal during the next quiz and I’ll get you out. Love, James

If you haven’t played HQ then you’re missing out. The twice-daily, live, app-based game show lets contestants answer questions in the hopes of winning a cash prize. Answer all 12 correctly and you split the pot with other players who were also perfect on the quiz. More-importantly, it’s hosted by Scott Rogowsky.

Scott is your twice-daily friend who gives you a chance to win money. He lets you play bar trivia from your couch. He’s friendly and exuberant and has a smile that lights up a room. He’s also in trouble and he needs our help.

On Tuesday The Daily Beast wrote a profile on Scott, trying to tell us a little more about the man behind the smile, and things got very weird. HQ’s CEO freaked out, threatened to fire Scott because he mentioned his favorite salad company, and it became one of the more bizarre stories of the year.

Jeff Gerstmann of GiantBomb.com is the progenitor of the “Caged Scott” theory, and I believe he’s on to something. He’s been a strong proponent of the notion that Scott is in trouble since long before the Daily Beast article. Yesterday just reinforced it.

The “Caged Scott” theory is simple: Scott is kept in a cage in a New York apartment and only released to film HQ twice a day, at which time he asks the questions out of fear before retreating to his kennel. When the idea was floated a month back it just seemed funny, now it’s all too real.

Need more evidence? Just look at this progression following the fallout from the article:

This is a man who is inhaling salad at a record pace for fear of his fresh greens being taken away as soon as the selfie is over. Scott, who I only assume normally lives on Hot Pockets and drinks water from an over-sized hamster bottle, is sending us a clear message — we need to help him.

This is our chance, internet. We must work together. Scott — send us a message, any message. Roll your eyes during the fourth question tonight and we’ll know. We love you. We’re here for you.