Knicks owner James Dolan is being sued by MSG shareholders who allege he’s being paid too much for relatively little work, especially considering how much time he spends on his band “JD & The Straight Shot.”
7 reasons James Dolan should spend more time on music than the Knicks
The evidence is clear.
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James Dator has been covering a wide range of sports for SB Nation for over a decade, with a special focus on the NFL.
The suit asserts that Dolan is only a part-time employee of MSG, which doesn’t warrant the $75 million he’s been paid over the last three years. Now, I’m not one to get into what James Dolan is, or isn’t worth. I’ll let all those Richie Rich’s figure that one out — but I am here to prove that Dolan should be spending even more time on his music.
Fig. 1 — Global graph of interest.
More people enjoy music than the Knicks.
Fig. 2 — Dolan photographic interest.
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James Dolan enjoys music more than he enjoys the Knicks.
We have now established two things: Firstly, that more people on the planet earth like music than the New York Knicks — and secondly that Dolan is one of those people. It would be better for his personal growth and that of the Knicks for him to remove himself further from operations and focus fully on his music.
Fig. 3 — This music is bad.
Fig. 4 — Really not good at all.
Fig. 5 — Really quite bad.
Fig. 6 — I’d share these opinions on YouTube, but commenting is disabled.
At the highest-end of quality the average JD & The Straight Shot song has musical aspirations that top out at being the theme song for a season of True Detective. This isn’t me being a nickpicky ass either — there’s no evidence anyone really likes Dolan’s band.
The JD & The Straight Shot YouTube account has been uploading videos since 2016 and has amassed just 498 subscribers. Fewer people are interested in Dolan’s band than this guy named “Catus Maximus” who reviews hammers and X-Acto Knives.
JD & The Straight Shot have uploaded 13 music videos to YouTube. These have gained a total of 1,546 likes and 3,662 dislikes. This 70.3 percent dislike ratio is significantly worse than the Mr. Blobby Song — one of the worst songs of all time.
Is James Dolan’s music bad? Yes.
Is it among the worst music ever made? No.
This leads us to one of two conclusions:
- Angry Knicks fans are intentionally downvoting Dolan’s band out of anger.
- Dolan’s band needs more practice.
Fig. 7 — This motivational poster I found on Pinterest.
If Dolan spends more time on his music then the motivational poster in Fig. 7 tells me he will get better. Therefore benefiting both himself (Fig. 2) and the world (Fig. 3).
If he continues on his current path the world will continue to be sadder (Fig. 3-6) and Knicks fans will continue to be angry.
There is only one solution to all this: James Dolan should quit the Knicks and focus full time on playing his music.
