The Driverless NASCAR Power Rankings: Darlington

It seems like every website has some version of a weekly NASCAR Power Rankings – except us. So at SB Nation, we figured it was about time to join the fun.

Along with SB Nation contributor Jordan Bianchi and the anonymous-but-funny @nascarcasm, here’s a completely unscientific NASCAR power poll, except without any NASCAR drivers included.

1. Rick Hendrick

Reason: Hey, 200 wins for the greatest team owner in NASCAR history should be worth the top spot.

2. NASCAR official who fell onto Kurt Busch’s hood

Reason: This dude went toe-to-toe with Ryan Newman’s burly gas man and bounced right back up after he was pushed stumbled backward onto the No. 51’s hood. Plus, he did all this while holding his helmet.

3. NASCAR

Reason: Finally got some controversy after what had been an uneventful season so far.

4. Fans of Danica Patrick

Reason: So many people expected Danica’s Darlington debut to be a disaster, but she ran two clean races and brought home the car in one piece after gaining much-needed experience.

5. Lady Luck

Reason: She continues to put a beatdown on Jeff Gordon every week, which is a big feat considering he’s a four-time champion.

6. Lady In Black

Reason: Darlington didn’t prove to be quite as fearsome as she has in the past, but she still did enough to scare future rookies.

7. Kurt Busch’s crew guys

Reason: It can’t be easy to be Busch’s defenders, but the No. 51 crew stood up for their driver and proved they have his back.

8. Tony Stewart’s P.R. man

Reason: Stewart didn’t get a penalty from NASCAR for his post-race Talladega comments and had a controversy-free weekend. We’re guessing Stewart’s public relations team enjoyed that very much.

9. Guy who paints the walls at Darlington

Reason: Job security is hard to come by in any profession, but there were enough Darlington stripes to ensure he’ll have a gig next year.

10. NASCAR drivers’ moms

Reason: They got to give the command and walk out with their sons during pre-race introductions. But some of them were booed along with their boys (like Mrs. Busch, who got booed twice).

Wild Card No. 1: Ryan Newman’s gas man

Reason: Established himself as one dude you do not want to mess with. But will he get penalized for it?

Wild Card No. 2: Fifth Third Bank

Reason: Matt Kenseth’s “new number” turned out to be a misleading sponsor announcement. Still, it got a lot of publicity for a minor news item.

Did we miss an item? Let us know in the comments section below!