Monday is the day you’re supposed to hit the gym. Gotta work off all those wings and pints of beer, right? Yeah, yeah, but you gotta work all day and then there’s FOOTBALL at night again! Well, we’ve got the solution: get fit WHILE you watch football. With the ultra-predictable “Monday Night Football” broadcast, it should be a breeze!
Monday Night Fitness is the Colts-Giants drinking game for your body
It’s that time again! We’ll whip you into shape WHILE you watch football.
Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports
Bill Hanstock is a writer, author and Emmy Award-winning producer. He began writing for SB Nation in 2011.
It’s real simple. Think of it like a drinking game, but with more sweating (or less, depending on your drinking regimen). Something on the list happens, you do the appropriate exercise. Got it? Get to it.
Here are your Monday Night Fitness assignments for Colts at Giants on Monday night:
| EVERY TIME: | DO THIS: |
| You see fans who are shivering in the bitter cold | 20 crunches |
| Any mention of Frank Sinatra or "New York, New York" | 5 minute plank |
| Anyone mentions the stadium isn't actually in New York | Run a marathon |
| Stock footage of the Statue of Liberty | 20 lunges |
| ESPN shows aerial view of the stadium | 20 squats |
| "Rebuilding year." | 25 squats |
| You hear "I WAS BOOORN FREEEE" | 20 crunches |
| Stock footage of the Freedom Tower | 20 jumping jacks |
| Announcers say "The Big Apple" | 10 pushups |
| Any group of fans with team name spelled out across multiple chests | 2 laps around your block |
| ESPN shows any footage of stadium food | 15 pushups |
| ESPN cuts to a cute kid in the crowd | 10 second plank |
| Stock footage of subways | 15 squats |
| That stupid "fans singing" NFL app commercial comes on | 20 lunges |
| Cameras find a fan with a sign using the letters "ESPN" in a clever way | 20 bicep curls with a canned good |
| Stock footage of the Empire State Building | 15 second side plank |
| ESPN puts up a graph showing Eli Manning's terrible stats | 10 handstand pushups |
| ESPN puts up a graph comparing Eli and Peyton's stats | 20 handstand pushups |
| The Eli/Peyton comparison graph involves a pun | Finish watching on treadmill |
| Jon Gruden doesn't know what a common word means | 20 burpees |
We believe in you. Feel the burn.
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