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Come Fan with UsThursday, July 2, 2026

Steed Malbranque’s Son Doesn’t Have Cancer Because He Doesn’t Exist

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A few days ago, a story was emerging out of France that the reason not-anymore-St.-Etienne-midfielder Steed Malbranque hung up his boots this summer was to take care of his cancer-stricken son. Being unverified, most papers didn’t push the story, but some - determined to be at the front of the queue, no doubt - went along with it anyway, spreading the ‘news’ far and wide.

The probem? Steed Malbranque doesn’t actually have a son. No son means no cancer means no story, and it’s baffling that newspapers would publish along those lines without even the most basic of fact checks. It shouldn’t have taken a statement from Malbranque’s lawyers to clear up the mess, because the media should be better at not reporting message-board nonsense with no basis in fact whatsoever. Good grief.

Just so we’re clear: Steed Malbranque’s son does not have cancer. It is not possible for his son to have cancer, because his son does not exist.

*And particularly illiterately, if ‘steed Malbranue has quit football to care for his sick son who was recently diagnosed with cancer’ from the Daily Mirror is any judge.

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