Braun Strowman wins a wild Money in the Bank Men’s Ladder Match

We’re going to start this post off with Finn Balor’s abs. For no reason at all. If you object, then I’m sorry the you live a life where you cannot appreciate these glistening abs.

Doesn’t even matter if he wins the fight or not. That’s a win enough for now. Don’t change a thing about the way you live your life, Finn.

The non-abs portion of this match started with New Day revealing that Kofi would be the member of their crew competing alongside Braun Strowman, Finn Balor, The Miz, Rusev, Bobby Roode, Kevin Owens, and Samoa Joe and then everyone going after Braun Strowman in the corner of the ring.

Braun broke loose and dismissed everyone else from the ring, going to get a ladder right off the bat. He barely got the ladder into the ring before Samoa Joe hit him from behind and Kofi followed suit.

Strowman went after Kevin Owens, only for Finn Balor and Bobby Roode to go after him with a ladder and everyone else dropping ladders on him to complete the job. Miz took the opening of everyone else being distracted by their ladder dog pile to put the ladder up in the ring and getting halfway to the case before Samoa Joe stopped him.

Finn Balor and Rusev tried to get in the ring and failed, Samoa Joe pinned The Miz in the corner with the ladder, and then Kofi got in the mix by dispatching both Joe and Miz with kicks and slams. When he was halfway up the ladder, Kevin Owens took him down and got in a chase to the top with Finn Balor.

Balor got his fingertips on the case, only for Owens to drag him down — and get slammed as retaliation. Balow tried again get back up the ladder only to get taken down by Roode that time. He returned the favor and DDT’d Roode, following it up with a drop kick.

Finn didn’t even get back to the ladder this time, as Owens knocked him down with the ladder, driving him out of the ring and throwing him on to a table. As the announcers objected, Owens started climbing a ladder to leap onto his rival Balor, but Rusev started climbing the ladder in the ring and drew Owens away from his objective.

Rusev didn’t even give him a shot at the ladder, and after some changing of who was on top of the proverbial heap Kofi eventually found his way to the ladder. He was stopped, and everyone tackled him in a scrum outside of the ring. Finn Balor leaped back into action and destroyed that pile of bodies.

Balor followed it up by going to grab a ladder off the pile that was covering Strowman, which brought Strowman back into the action as well. He took Balor out and got ready to re-enter the ring before Rusev went after him and Kevin Owens followed it up with a hit of his own.

Rusev, Kevin Owens, and Strowman go into it with the first two trying to put Strowman into a table only for him to break away. But Samoa Joe helped them complete their goal by restraining Strowman so Kevin Owners could punch him. Joe then encouraged Owens to climb the tallest ladder in the arena to slam Strowman off the top of it but his plans were once again interrupted when Strowman broke free, climbed to the top of the ladder, dragged an escaping KO with him, and then threw Owens off of it into a table.

Which, to be completely clear here, WAS SUPER AWESOME.

Kofi decided he wanted a piece of Strowman, and completely failed in his attempt. Then Strowman worked his way into the ring by barreling through two guys and a ladder, dragging a horrified Miz off the ladder he was standing on and heading for the case himself. It was a really good Miz face, just see for yourself.

Samoa Joe took Strowman down, and when the latter was on his way back into the ring Finn Balor came out of nowhere again to toss him into the timekeepers’ area and head back into the ring. Rusev, Roode, and Joe were then the three in the ring and Rusev dispatched them both. He then did the same to Kofi, who honestly never stood a shot.

Rusev followed that up by stacking Bobby Roode and Kofi and putting them into a hold, which Roode tried to tap out of but couldn’t in this match. The Miz tried to take a piece out of him and failed as well.

Rusev then went for the Triple Accolade of Miz, Roode, and Kofi, but was interrupted by Samoa Joe. Who just kept showing up when it matters most. Rusev dismissed him pretty easily and got up on the ladder, only for Miz to return and toss the ladder over himself and start climbing again.

With a huge smile on his face, Miz got to the top of the ladder and had his hand on the case when Kofi climbed to the top and punched him in the nuts. They fought with each other for long enough that Roode got inside and tipped it over, with Finn Balor close behind.

Balor did a flying leap into Roode’s stomach to put himself into position to climb the ladder with no interruption, only for Strowman to come into the ring and drag him off the ladder. Samoa Joe tried to get involved again but that lasted only briefly.

Balor started climbing again, Strowman started climbing the other side, and Kofi leaped onto Strowman’s back in the most violent parent-and-child piggyback situation ever. They battled for a bit but the result was pretty apparent by that point.

Strowman tossed Kofi to the ground, and with no one left to stop him he got the case all for himself, and now has the Money In the Bank cash-in for whenever he wants to use it. What an exciting, surprising match from start to finish.