‘Miz and Mrs.’ Hitz and Misses: Let’s go line dancing

Well we’ve watched pranks, childbirth, moves halfway across the country, baby showers (with Avril Lavigne!), and some of the most impressive pregnancy eating every put on screen. But now we’ve reached the finale of Miz & Mrs., and while there will be more adventures of Miz and Maryse next year at some point who knows if I’ll be recapping them here.

So for now, let’s dig into the last episode of this first season and go through one more round of the hits and misses of this fun, always-entertaining wrestling couple.

As far as new home names go, Castle Marmiz is a good option to replace Chateau Marmiz. And while the name is quality, the property is even better. This finale could have been nothing but an HGTV-style look at this new mansion and it would have been just fine. Infinity pool! Endless rooms! Apparently enough square footage to make the move from LA completely worth it! I want to go to there.

Multiple phone runarounds, not being on time, saying the words “uh huh” and then kicking Miz to hold, saying that their chosen date of move-in was their “preference.” If that moving company got in the ring with Miz they wouldn’t leave it conscious, that’s for sure.

Maryse grabbing the phone and giving the service rep a piece of her mind about the difference between a contract and a preferential date was honestly inspiring. Maryse should open a business where she takes on people’s customer service fights for them.

If you try to tell me you didn’t find Marjo’s scooter shenanigans in the store funny you’re definitely lying. Sure, knocking over a display might have been one piece of messiness too far but Marjo has never done anything wrong in my eyes and I will not start calling her out now. Marjo forever.

Pumpkin has an independent streak apparently, and while it was a little funny to watch Miz and Maryse have panic attacks thinking the dog was running willy nilly around the neighborhood when in reality it had opened the door by itself and returned to the house without them knowing, Monroe needs fully functioning parents and not ones distraught over losing their dog the first day of living in a new state.

To quote Miz: “I want to kill someone after Pumpkin.” Please, get massages you too.

Relaxing is important. Moving is difficult. Complaining can be cathartic. All of these things are true yet Miz and Maryse complaining about their difficult move in their tour bus while eating caviar and planning how to take more breaks from their celebrity lifestyles was a little ridiculous. Bless them both for realizing that and checking themselves with some light mockery.

What a set of pictures to end the season with. Couldn’t have planned it better.