There are college football awards for everything.
The Big College Football Trophy watch list, Week 1: Introducing our dumb award
Most college football awards go to the best player or something lame like that. We give this award to our favorites, and this week, those favorites are sexy big dudes and Kenny Hill.
There are awards for the best player at each position. There are four for best quarterback. There are awards for things that aren’t really positions, like the Paul Hornung Award for the most versatile player or the Lombardi Trophy, which is for “a down lineman on either offense or defense or a linebacker who lines up no farther than five yards deep from the ball.”
And yet, in a sport that more than any other feeds off of unadulterated joy, there’s no award that goes to the player we enjoy watching the most.
That is the goal of SB Nation’s Big College Football Trophy. As of right now, we do not have a physical award to ship to the eventual winner, but we’re working on it.
Each week we’ll discuss the players and things that filled us with the most joy the prior week, and you’re welcome to nominate or point out omissions in the comments. Get to the end of the year, and if we’re lucky, we will present somebody with a trophy for something dumb.
To this week’s players!
The watch list
Kenny Hill, QB, Texas A&M
A quarterback’s college debut is supposed to be against FCS squad Poopstrom State. He’s supposed to go 18-for-24 with 250 yards, two touchdowns, and an interception. And this performance is supposed to be lauded by his team’s fanbase as a sign that this player is a superstar that will lead the team to [insert what your school considers to be a glorious moment here].
Kenny Hill's college debut was not against Poopstrom State. It was against South Carolina, a team that was supposed to be good at defense. It was on the road, in front of a hyped Williams-Brice, and it counted in the SEC standings. Oh, and he had to fill the shoes of a charismatic, talented superstar who elevated Texas A&M from some football team in Texas to a national buzzword.
And he didn’t go 18-of-24 with 250 yards, two TD’s and a pick. He lit the Gamecocks up, with 511 yards and three touchdowns. And because of that last guy, we were hit with a slew of national attention for Kenny:
KENNY FOOTBALL!!! #GigEm
— Johnny Manziel (@JManziel2) August 29, 2014 Kenny Hill said of all the nicknames he might prefer Kenny Trill the most right now.
— Brent Zwerneman (@BrentZwerneman) September 2, 2014 Like the idea of "Kenny Trill" but I think @coachsumlin would agree one good game alone doesn't make you trill. He's on his way though!
— Bun B (@BunBTrillOG) September 2, 2014 We just have one thing to say: To immediately begin drawing comparisons between Hill and Manziel is understandable, since one directly follows the other at a school. It's also unfair, and makes about as much sense as comparing Manziel to his predecessor, converted wide receiver-turned top-NFL prospect Ryan Tannehill. At this point two years ago, Johnny Manziel was a kid who had gotten into a barfight. Now he's Johnny Football, source of national debate.
Kenny Hill is a flower, and let’s watch him bloom of his own accord. (Also, Kenny Trill is clearly the best nickname.)
Rafael Gaglianone, Wisconsin, K
Gaglione hit his first career FG attempt for Wisconsin, a 51-yarder, and celebrated thusly:
Not enough kickers do sexy dances after kicking. Not enough kickers are 5’11, 231-pounders. We can’t think of anything more B1G than a large, in-charge, libidinous kicker.
Although the Badgers' season got off to a less-than-stellar start when they stopped giving the ball to Melvin Gordon against LSU, we could see Gaglianone thrusting after hitting a game-winner at the Big Ten Championship in Indy.
Ole Miss’ murderkill defense
We can tell the Rebels played well defensively against Boise State, because they only allowed 13 points, picked off the Broncos four times, and held Jay Ajayi to 86 yards. This, however, does not quite tell you everything about Ole Miss' defense:
These videos do:
As does this GIF:
Somewhere along the line, we realized football was too dangerous for people to play, so we started putting in rules about how you could tackle somebody so their future might not be ruined. Ole Miss did not break many of these rules, but still managed to hit violently and efficiently enough to make the Georgia Dome go OOOOH in unison, over and over again.
We suppose an honorary mention goes to Boise State QB Grant Hedrick, who has a preternatural understanding of how to complete passes to his receivers in such a way that they will get lit up instantly.
And this week’s front-runner
Caleb Lawrence, Jacksonville State, DE
Exposed midriff has been a part of college football since the half-shirts of the 1980’s and 1990’s. What we saw from Jacksonville State’s Caleb Lawrence Friday night as his Gamecocks took to the FBS stage against Michigan State was not merely exposed midriff. It wasn’t a chance fabric slip. It was a conscious decision by a 300-pound man with an enormous beard to show as much of those 300 pounds as possible, and you can go to hell if you want to judge him.
Lawrence says that his custom tailored jersey is, in part, a football decision, giving opponents as little fabric to grab as possible. Sure. We’ll accept that answer. Also, the reason I got really drunk at my fantasy draft Monday night is because I got really drunk at my fantasy draft last year and won, and I’m dedicated to victory. We’ll accept whatever justification we need to get as much man stomach on our TV as possible.
Lawrence didn’t play the most magnificent game -- he did have three tackles, but the Gamecocks lost by almost 40. He’s an All-OVC defensive lineman, so he’s more than just a silly garment. The Gamecocks are definitely our team of choice in the Ohio Valley from here on out.
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