Augusta National chair Billy Payne droned on for what seemed hours on Wednesday about the dearly departed Eisenhower Tree, tragically felled in the prime of its life by Mother Nature in 2014.
Augusta chairman Billy Payne pays more respect to a dead tree than women’s tournament
Payne can sure wax nostalgic -- and go on and on -- about a dead pile of pulp, but a ‘Nope’ would have sufficed when asked about the possibility of a women’s tournament on the sacred grounds of Augusta National.
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Payne, in his annual interminable state-of-the-Masters address, was as frigid in his five-sentence refusal to stage a women’s tournament on the iconic grounds of the dead pine as he was moved by eulogizing the pulpy remains of “this great specimen”:
The only thing absent from Chairman Payne's address to media was a request for 60 secs silence re the deceased Eisenhower Tree #beyondparody
— John Huggan (@johnhuggan) April 8, 2015 “As all of you know, last year we lost an iconic symbol of Augusta National Golf Club, the famous Eisenhower Tree,” an emotional Payne said about the landmark beacon on the 17th fairway that so befuddled a former commander-in-chief and legions of golfers since then.
“The famous Eisenhower Tree, which connected us to our beloved member, U.S. president, Dwight David Eisenhower, was lost and sadly the victim of an ice storm”:
I'm unclear on Chairman Payne's talk: Who died in the ice storm, the Eisenhower Tree or President Eisenhower?
— Gary VanSickle (@GaryVanSickle) April 8, 2015 It went on from there, complete with the presentation of a cross-section of the late, lamented, as well as sprigs grafted from the original in a successful attempt to preserve “its genetics.” For real:
Crisis section of the Eisenhower Tree plus 2 preserved graphs of the original. pic.twitter.com/bBbuM1n9wD
— Scott Michaux (@ScottMichaux) April 8, 2015 Twitter reacted to Payne’s hushed tones with the respect they deserved.
Payne, who praised the Drive, Chip & Putt event for its importance to the future of golf, took a chainsaw to any discussion about how hosting a tournament for women -- a pet project of LPGA commissioner Mike Whan -- might help grow the game.
You may recall that Augusta members tepidly broke the grass ceiling when they finally bowed to societal pressure and begrudgingly invited two women to join their ranks back in 2012. They added a third -- IBM chief executive Virginia Rometty -- last year, which is really just so swell.
“I don’t think so. I believe I had that question last year or the year before,” a stern-looking Masters chair said. “We have a very short member season at Augusta National, it’s seven months only. The time that we dedicate to the preparation and conduct of the tournament is already extensive.
“I don’t think that we would ever host another tournament here”:
Billy Payne says he wants to grow the game as much as he can yet says Augusta will never host a women's event? #HypocriticalMuch? #Augusta
— Chelsea Lynn Pezzola (@clpezzola) April 8, 2015 Any more question about the tree? Anyone?:
Augusta Nat'l Chairman talks about loss of a tree for 10 min and dismisses idea of hosting a women's tournament in 10 seconds #tireshoptv
— Jessa Loomis (@jessaloomis) April 8, 2015 See More:
