Brewers Will Build Bud Selig Statue, Hooligans Will Engrave it With Asterisks

It’s beginning to feel a little like someone put Oprah in charge of deciding who gets statues in sports. First, you, Nick Saban, get a statue. Then you, Florida Heisman Trophy winners, get statues. And now, Bud Selig, you get a statue. Does everybody get a statue?

⇥”“We are proud to honor Commissioner Selig for all of his efforts on behalf of the Milwaukee Brewers and Major League Baseball,” Brewers principal owner Mark Attanasio said. “The Brewers and Miller Park are in this city because of the Commissioner’s vision and dedicated efforts. Just as importantly, he has remained a prominent and highly philanthropic member of our community while effectively leading Major League Baseball during his tenure as baseball’s top executive.”⇥⇥The statues of Aaron and Yount were unveiled on April 5, 2001, the first year of Miller Park’s existence. The first two statues were donated by Selig’s charitable foundation.⇥

That “donate two, get one built in your honor” deal is sweet if you can get it.

In fairness, Selig deserves some sort of monument as testament to his time in baseball, even if only for what he has meant to Milwaukee. He founded the Brewers in 1970 by moving the bankrupt Seattle Pilots to Milwaukee and the organization won seven Organization of the Year awards under his watch. His time as MLB Commissioner, obviously, has been a little rougher, with wins (the Wild Card format), losses (steroids, World Series games in November) and ties (uh, that All-Star Game tie in 2002) on his record.

But the best detail of the statue has nothing to do with Selig’s accomplishments. Apparently, it will be “more than seven feet tall” which is code for “it will be repeatedly defaced by ne’er-do-wells unhappy with Selig’s leadership and amused by a seven-foot version of him in bronze.”

Now, I’m not saying it should be repeatedly disturbed. But if Oprah ever has to do a show on a decade-long war against the statue of Bud Selig, I’ll understand.

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