Normally I’m all about celebrating the human body in all it’s beautiful forms — and then I saw the legs of cyclist Tomasz Marczyński. It’s been a while since we appreciated just how gnarly cycling legs can be, and Marczyński’s Instagram account is an ode to just how gross they are.
We can’t unsee these horrifically gross cycling legs
He’s got legs — and I don’t want to see him use them.
James Dator has been covering a wide range of sports for SB Nation for over a decade, with a special focus on the NFL.
Marczyński’s legs take on the form of different things. For instance, in this photo they look like melting clocks in a Salvadore Dali painting.
I’m no expert on the human anatomy, but I’m pretty sure I don’t possess weird ancillary leg muscles that can bulge out like I’m hiding a kielbasa under my skin.
I’m pretty sure I saw these in an episode of Planet Earth and this is just a topographical map of the Sahara desert.
It’s almost like his calves are forming that optical illusion picture where it’s either a lamp or two people kissing.
I don’t really know what I’m looking at with these legs, but I’m fairly certain it was on Stranger Things.
I’m mostly mystified how those socks can contain bulging leg muscles like this. I’d assumed they’re just burst out like the Incredible Hulk when he gets angry.
For some reason I got hungry when I looked at this photo of Marczyński’s legs, only to realize they reminded me of a nicely dry-aged salami.
Now I want salami.
Come now, Tomasz, your hamstring has a butt. Now you’re just showing off.
I feel like this one should have a Brazzers logo slapped on it.
Ultimately, there’s something beautiful about these. When I get past the horror of their veins, the weird bulges, and clothes — barely managing to contain this masses of muscle and sinewy flesh, Marczyński’s legs make me feel OK about skipping leg day. If this is the end game, I’m happy to chill at the beginning.
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