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Come Fan with UsTuesday, August 4, 2026

The Bills got owned ... by the Colts’ mascot

Just when you think things couldn’t get worse for Buffalo’s quarterbacks ...

Jacksonville Jaguars v Indianapolis Colts
Jacksonville Jaguars v Indianapolis Colts
Photo by Andy Lyons/Getty Images

No one expected much out of the Bills this year, let alone their offense. How they have two wins is one of the season’s greatest mysteries. But they still came in to Sunday with a better record than the team they were playing: the Colts.

The Bills were trotting out 35-year-old quarterback Derek Anderson, who had been signed less than two weeks earlier to serve as a mentor to rookie Josh Allen. Days later, Allen was injured against the Texans, a loss that happened because Nathan Peterman was his most Nathan Petermanish.

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That gave the Week 7 quarterback job to Anderson, who completed a whole two passes last season with the Panthers. He was not much better against the Colts. Anderson completed 20 of 31 passes (not bad) for 175 yards (ehhh), no touchdowns (eeek), and three interceptions (yowzers). He also lost a fumble.

If nothing else, it was an incredibly Bills QB game — somehow, Anderson’s 39.8 passer rating was better than Allen’s against the Packers in Week 4 (36.3) and Peterman’s in Week 1 against the Ravens (uh, 0.0).

But it was a worse passing day than everyone else at Lucas Oil Stadium. That includes Blue, the Colts’ mascot who usually gets his kicks by trolling kids or humping the air:

Blue doubled down on the trash talk the next day.

In his return this season from a longtime shoulder injury, Andrew Luck has been both prolific and doesn’t have much to show for it. No quarterback has attempted more passes this year than Luck, but he has also thrown for just 6.3 yards per attempt.

It didn’t matter on Sunday, when Luck threw for just 156 yards but also had four touchdowns. That upped his total to 20 touchdown passes in 2018, with 15 of those coming in the last four games. Those four touchdown passes are also more than the Bills have had ALL season.

In less surprising news, the Bills lost by double digits, this time for a Scorigami of 37-5:

The quarterback situation doesn’t look any more promising in the near future, either.

Allen still isn’t ready to return. Peterman is still Peterman. Anderson, who will remain the starter for now, is feeling the effects of being 35 and starting your first game in two years:

Oh yeah, and their next game is against the Patriots on Monday Night Football in Week 8.

As ominous as that sounds, at least it’s a fitting way to celebrate Halloween week.

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