Sam Allardyce Named As West Ham United Manager

Allardyce may have a very high opinion of himself, but he’s a very good manager if you aren’t interested in aesthetics. West Ham will be hoping to come straight back up to the Premier League next season, and there are few better suited for that job than ‘Big Sam’.

The former midfielder appears to be mildly confused about the talent available to him and his analysis riddled with cliches. Perfect for West Ham, eh?

McClaren said in a statement to Skay Sports News: “It is very flattering to be linked with a club of West Ham’s size and historic stature, also one that has tremendous fans. However, at this moment in time I do not wish to be considered for the position. But I wish everybody at West Ham all the very best for the future.”

“The sooner the better, that is important. There is lots of work to do, an enormous amount of work. But at the same time we mustn’t be rushed.”

Grant was actually sacked during the post-match press conference, being hauled away from the camera’s before a club spokesperson came out to reveal that he was no longer the team’s manager. Kevin Keen will take over for the final - utterly meaningless - game of the season as West Ham brace themselves for Championship football next year. Grant has managed to achieve the monumentally impressive feat of getting teams relegated from the Premier League in two successive seasons, something that’s never before been accomplished in the Premier League era. Will he get a second chance? Time will tell, but it doesn’t look great.