Premier League, Week 31: Stoke City puts four past Aston Villa

Despite a rough start to their match against Southampton, Tottenham Hotspur showed some fighting spirit and battled back to claim a 3-2 win at White Hart Lane. After going down 2-0, it would have been easy for Spurs to collapse, especially considering their recent run of poor results. Instead, a Christian Eriksen brace and a last-minute winner gave them all three points. What a difference a few days makes.

The opening half was an unhappy one for right backs. All three goals were a direct result of errors from either Kyle Naughton or Nathaniel Clyne, and it was Naughton who won the impromptu comedy battle with a pair of absolutely ridiculous mistakes.

Whether he’s aggressively throwing his gilet to the ground in anger, saying completely nonsensical things in press conferences, or sending his team out without any semblance of tactics or team cohesion at all, Tim Sherwood has an intriguing-yet-simultaneously-frightening unpredictability not too dissimilar to a punter who’s had one too many on a Friday night.

Out: Étienne Capoue (ankle), Vlad Chiricheș (back), Michael Dawson (hamstring), Erik Lamela (thigh). In doubt: Kyle Walker (groin), Mousa Dembélé (hamstring), Emmanuel Adebayor (ankle).

Aston Villa injuries and suspensions

Out: Jores Okoré (knee), Libor Kozák (broken leg), Charles N’Zogbia (achilles), Chris Herd (personal reasons). In doubt: None.

The Hammers replied by pushing up, and Mohamed Diamé might have done better when he worked his way through the visitors’ makeshift defence only to delay his shot to long and cough up possession, but Manchester United had West Ham right where they wanted them -- pressing up the pitch and leaving space behind into which they could surge.

But seriously, go look at that Rooney goal some more.

Goals, good.

Halfway goals, really good.

Liverpool fought through an early series of wobbles to crush Cardiff City in Wales and stay in the thick of the title race. The Reds have struggled defensively all season, but nobody’s questioning their scoring chops, and even when the hosts took the lead twice there was never any doubt that Brendan Rodgers’ side had the firepower to get themselves back into the match -- the 5-2 win is further testament to just how dangerous the likes of Luis Suarez and Daniel Sturridge can be.

An action-packed first half finished level, but that wasn’t for lack of trying on either teams part. Both were firing on all cylinders going forward but extraordinarily confused at the back, which made for some entertaining viewing. Jordon Match opened the scoring in the ninth minute, firing past Simon Mignolet following a careless turnover from Joe Allen, and Frazier Campbell produced another fine finish for Cardiff’s second after picking up the ball in the right channel and turning Daniel Agger inside out.

City took a deserved lead in the 26th minute when Fernando Amorebieta have Álvaro Negredo a bit of a shove in the back as the striker tried to bring down a long ball in the Fulham box. Amorebieta saw yellow and the home side were given a penalty, which Yaya Touré converted to give City a 1-0 lead.

Touré completed the hat trick in fantastic fashion in the 65th minute, unleashing a curling strike from 30-yards out that eluded both defenders and Stockdale on its way to the back of the net.

Alexander Tettey is a god here to humor us with 35-yard volleys.

I would say that he will never score a better goal in his life except he is immortal so the concept of “life” does not apply to him.

Whether or not it was preferable for Arsenal to still have Gibbs on the pitch instead of Oxlade-Chamberlain, the game was already over by the time that mistake by Marriner had any effect at all. Eden Hazard’s penalty after that handball was not the game’s first goal, but its third.

Eto’o had to come off injured in the 10th minute, but his absence didn’t hinder Chelsea, who went 3-0 ahead after Hazard’s penalty. Just before halftime, the Blues found a fourth, with Eto’o’s replacement setting up Oscar with a square ball that the Brazilian was able to smash into the back of the net.

This is Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain.

This is Kieran Gibbs.

Despite two straight losses, West Ham remain safely clear of the relegation battle. Their six point cushion is good but continued failures to get points could lead to them being drug back down into the ruckus to avoid the Championship next season. If there was ever a great time for the Irons to collect some much needed point against United, Saturday might be the day thanks to the Red Devils’ weakened state.

West Ham injuries and suspensions

Don’t be fooled by City’s fourth place position, they’re still holding two or three games in hand on all three teams ahead of them, but winning those in-hand games is never a sure thing. Before Manuel Pellegrini can worry about that though, his team will have to focus on Fulham, a match they absolutely have to win.

Manchester City injuries and suspensions

Cardiff City injuries and suspensions

Out: Mark Hudson (hamstring). In doubt: Ben Turner (knock), Andrew Taylor (knock).

However, there are a few problems. Wenger has never won against José Mourinho in all of their meetings, with the Portuguese manager’s unbeaten Premier League home record still intact. If Arsenal were to win at Stamford Bridge, it’d be quite the upset. This season has been an unusually good one for the Gunners, but this could well be their toughest task yet.

Chelsea injuries and suspensions

There’s no such thing as a truly boring game between relegation battlers at this point in the season, since every save or near-miss is so tense that it feels like the most important event in your football-watching life, but this game might come close to being boring. Norwich will probably play for a draw and Sunderland will probably not know what to do about that.

What, don’t act like Roy Hodgson won’t pick him.