Premier League, Week 35: Villa earn huge win against Sunderland

The visitors were second best for the rest of the first half, but they did get the ball in the net in stoppage time. Guzan had come out to collect a cross, and the ball had popped free to Gardner thanks to a mid-air collision between the goalkeeper and Graham. Gardner did his part in scrambling home, but Lee Probert waved the effort off for the foul on Guzan.

Probert had more work to do after the break, and the referee drew the ire of the home faithful by allowing Johnson to get away with a lunge from behind on Joe Bennett. But it was Sunderland who were most aggrieved by the officiating, which seemed to them to have played a huge rule in Villa’s third goal.

Aston Villa injuries and suspensions

Out: Chris Herd (foot), Marc Albrighton (foot), Richard Dunne (groin) In doubt: Joe Bennett (ankle)

• Full coverage of the Premier League weekend

• The FA’s incompetence doesn’t exonerate Luis Suarez

• Full coverage of the Premier League weekend

• The FA’s incompetence doesn’t exonerate Luis Suarez

Newcastle were miserable, and Debuchy took out his frustrations on Countinho, wiping out the Brazilian with a two-footed tackle that earned him his second yellow card and an early bath. From the free kick, Henderson’s whipped delivery evaded everyone in the box, flew past Elliot and parked itself in the bottom corner to make it 6-0.

It could have gotten worse. Coutinho hadn’t scored yet and attempted to rectify that deficiency with a long-range piledriver which Elliot just about managed to palm onto the crossbar, and Sturridge could have had a penalty after being wrestled to the ground by Taylor. But mercifully, the beating ended at six.

*I told my boss that I was volunteering to take any game and he assigned me this one because he is horrible. Kids, if you’re a young and ambitious writer who thinks a career in sports blogging or journalism is for you, I ask you to consider other career possibilities.

Crouch had a few comical misses later in the half, with the worst coming in the 63rd minute off a square ball from Jerome that was easier to tap in than miss. Stoke should have very easily scored three or four goals, but Norwich struggled to create chances in the second half, and the Potters never looked under threat of giving away points.

Don’t get the impression that West Ham were bad, that certainly wasn’t the case, they played very well and if not for some timely defending and bad luck they might of been able to claim a point from the game.

• Full coverage of the Premier League weekend

Out: Antolín Alcaraz (hamstring), Iván Ramis (knee) and Ben Watson (leg) In doubt: None

Tottenham Hotspur injuries and suspensions